Last night we had our premiere of O’Neill’s Desire Under the Elms! We were a bit worried about the turnout, but in all 45 people showed up which is a reasonable amount for our amateur theater. We were all nervous, particularly Miranda and I. We knew there would be two critics coming to see the show, one from the Leids Dagblad and one from the Leiderdorps Weekblad. One of these is actually quite honest, the other is usually enthusiastic about our productions no matter the quality.

No show is ever the same from one performance to the next. During rehearsals, we’ve had melodramatic ones, grisly ones, silly ones and even funny ones. The show went really well. Our performance last night had a thriller-quality to it, something I can never tell but which I can gather from the reactions of our audience afterwards. We were reasonably satisfied with it, especially considering it was the premiere, we were all nervous, and we had two critics watching us. Also, six of my friends came to see the show (Nelleke, Erik, Willemijn, Joyce, Vincent and Carlijn). Afterwards, Vincent, Yoyce, Carlijn and I wen to De Tregter for a few drinks, and to look at the stupidity of drunk and horny men trying to get the attention of women.

Tonight was a little different. There were only 23 people in the audience, and the performance had a lot more space and sadness to it than yesterday. Katelijn asked us before we began to not lock up and to feel free to follow the path that presented itself, emotionally. Personally, for my own part, I liked tonight’s performance better than yesterday’s, even though I sometimes felt like not acting at all.

The criticism of one of Toverlei’s past members was one reason why tonight didn’t feel too good. The other reason is that tomorrow’s show is cancelled because there aren’t enough reservations. Four, to be precise.

It feels like losing a battle to have to cancel, but it is also a relief because it’d be terrible performing for four people. We called them and offered them a discount if they could come see us on a different date–something that was easy as two of them were Hans’ friends, and two of them were mine (Diana and Carolien). That is also the reason why I’m sitting here on my balcony blogging and having a beer, rather than being in bed. On the other hand, I’ve volunteered to wait for people coming to see the show without a reservation tomorrow, from 2 till 2.30, at Toverlei.

That’s ok though, because I’ve just began reading “In de Ban van Mijn Vader” by Sandro Veronesi, and I’m already looking forward to reading it more tomorrow in front of Toverlei waiting for any chance visitors 🙂

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